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JURASSIC WORLD: the casting news keeps coming in

So because it’s Friday and because I love dinosaurs, here’s a quick rundown of all the casting news that’s trickled in for Jurassic World, the fourth installment in the best dinosaur movie franchise ever. 

Just announced cast members joining the dino ruckus: Judy Greer (13 Going on 30, like, every rom-com ever); Katie McGrath (Merlin); and Lauren Lapkus (Orange is the New Black). They join an already super impressive lineup: Jake Johnson (New Girl), Idris Elba (Luther), Chris Pratt (Parks and Rec), Bryce Howard (Lady in the Water), Vincent D’Onofrio (Law & Order: CI), Irrfan Khan (Life of Pi), Omar Sy (from the upcoming X-Men: Days of Future Past), Nick Robinson (Melissa & Joey), and BD Wong (Law & Order: SVU). 

Like I said. Quite a cast indeed. These humans and all  your favorite dinos are set to hit theaters June 12, 2015. 

April 4, 2014 VIEW POST

Scarlett Johansson will kick your ass (maybe take over the world) in LUCY trailer

Classic Besson. 

Scarlett Johansson stars in Lucy, an action-packed thriller in which she becomes a super human. Like, SUPER super. 

Story starts like any other: sexy lady waking up in a hotel room with no memory of the night before in which she was kidnapped and had a bag of drugs sewn into her stomach, forcing her to be a drug mule for some thugs (da fuck?). 

After getting the shit beat out of her the drugs start to leak into her bloodstream, but SURPRISE they are not regular drugs, they are super drugs, and now she’s a wicked smart/fast/strong/lethal woman on a mission. 

I thought this was just going to be a cool girl-turned-assassin thriller, but this drug looks like it gives her magical powers. Seems interesting. And Luc Besson! Hello. Yes. 

April 4, 2014 VIEW POST

Late night king David Letterman announces retirement in 2015

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After 32 years on late night TV, David Letterman has announced that he’ll be retiring when his current contract with CBS’ The Late Show with David Letterman runs out in 2015. Letterman is the longest-serving late night talk show host in the history of TV. YEAH. Suck on that, Leno! 

I can’t say I’m surprised, but I am still sad. I grew up watching Dave with my mom every night; the face of late night basically IS David Letterman to me! Though I have obviously grown to love the other guys like Conan and Jimmy, there will never be another Dave. You’ll be missed!

April 3, 2014 VIEW POST

Teeny tiny trailer teases final season of TRUE BLOOD

After six seasons (only 3 of which were really stellar), HBO’s vampire soap True Blood will be making its final blood-soaked bow this summer. HBO announced today the seventh and final season will premiere Sunday, June 22. 

Watch this teeny tiny little teaser trailer to get you in the spooky mood. 

April 3, 2014 VIEW POST

Watch this fan-made alternate HIMYM ending and weep at its perfection

AND JUST LIKE THAT ALL WAS RIGHT WITH THE WORLD AND THE MOTHER DOESN’T DIE AND EVERYTHING IS FINE. 

If only fans ruled the world. JESUS. 

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April 2, 2014 VIEW POST
April 1, 2014 VIEW POST

All the feels: Why I feel personally let down by the HIMYM finale

**SPOILERS AHEAD. Do not read if you have not seen the series finale.**

Let me start by saying that I will still love this show for a long time, and that if it’s on TBS or the CW or any other channel in syndication, I’m sure I’ll flip it on because it feels familiar and comforting. 

That is unless I see it’s the series finale, in which case I’ll just smash my TV and be done with it. 

The March 31 series finale of How I Met Your Mother had, well, a mother of a legacy to uphold after 9 long seasons of hilarity, friendship, heartbreak, slaps, and ingenious gags. Big, huge expectations to uphold. So why then, was the finale so un-HIMYM? So terribly NOT the series finale we wanted, much less needed? 

The episode starts off harmless enough, with Ted trying to jet away from the wedding, one last ditch attempt to escape everything that’s broken his heart in NY. After a teary and heartfelt goodbye to the gang (good moment #1), Ted is stuck waiting at the Farhampton bus stop. When an adorable twist of fate puts the Mother, heretofore referenced as her NAME Tracy, right there with him, we finally get the meet we have been waiting NINE YEARS for. It was cute, so stinkin’ cute, and it gave me all the fuzzies (good moment #2). 

It was then that everything started to disintegrate. The years go whirling by, first 2015, 2016, 2018, 2020, and so on. Speeding through the future was a conceit I predicted (as was the OTHER huge thing that happened in this finale, but more on that later), and for the most part, that trope for a series finale is fine (though no one will top Six Feet Under's future-summary. EVER.) 

When I first started to feel gypped though, was when Robin started to fall out of the picture, and then ultimately when she and Barney announced they had gotten a divorce. It was so abrupt, so stingingly painful; I thought it was surely in jest. 

The show had gone out of its way to convince us that Barney and Robin belonged together, that two people who had sworn off traditional love and had kept their emotional cards close to the vest their whole lives finally succumbed to true love and were going to make it work. And I believed it! They did work together, they did belong. It made sense. Barney and Robin were going to be together forever, and that was that. 

And in doing so, it cemented the notion that after nine long years, Ted and Robin were officially no longer on the table. Ted was destined to find his one and only, his soulmate, his mother, and it would NOT be Robin. I never wanted Ted and Robin to end up together. I had grown accustomed to that idea, and I liked it. Everyone has that one person who they could have ended up with but didn’t for various reasons, the one they’ll think about from time to time, for a long time. But it felt right that Ted was going to end up with someone else, someone new that he met and fell in love with the old fashioned way, just the way he had always wanted. 

So to fast-forward through the years, only to see Marshall unhappy about his job, he and Lily welcoming a third child and deciding to move out of their apartment, Barney revert to his old ways and HAVE A KID WITH SOME RANDO (more on that later), and Robin disappear even more while her fame was on the rise, it just felt rude. How dare the show throw away all the strides they had made to show Barney grow as a human. He HAD grown, hadn’t he? He and Robin had grown together and the show went above and beyond to make sure we knew that. So to see all of that get thrown right out the window was downright insulting. But we’re supposed to believe that the big moment we should care about for Barney was that he has a kid with some random chick? That also felt like we (and Barney) were being cheated with a quick-fix. I am not having it. 

And then back to Robin and Ted. So. we’re taken (very peripherally) through the big milestones that Ted and Tracy go through together—two kids, 7 years of being together—only to see they haven’t gotten married yet. I actually thought that little nugget of their story was nice, but for a second I thought it was going to end with the Mother dying before they could get married and I was like NO NO. Thank god that was not the case. 

So the end is nigh, Marshall has gotten the judgeship he has always wanted (good moment #3), Barney has a fucking kid, and it’s finally revealed that yes, the Mother has been dead this entire time, and Ted has been regaling his children with this story because she’s been dead for six years—SIX YEARS!!!! 

His kids call him out on his shit, saying this was not the story of how he met their mother, no no no, not at all. This was a story about how he was in love with Robin that whole time and now it’s time he goes and gets her. And the show says yes, yes it was. Of course.

I’m sorry, WHAT?

There are just so, so many problems with that train of thought. Not only does it TOTALLY gyp the mother out of the story of the love of her life and the life she and Ted built together, but it also practically throws the rest of the show out the window, too. In the same way they tried to rewrite the book on Barney in this finale, they do the same with Ted and Robin. After all the strides the show made to ensure that no, they do not end up together because Robin will be happy with Barney and Ted will be happy with Tracy, they just press reset and take us back to square one. 

All the progress Ted made to move past Robin, all the broken hearts and empty altars and failed relationships led him to Tracy. That was always how it was going to be. To have the show tell me that after all that he gets dealt the shittiest of shitty cards, loses her, and then decides that really it was Robin all along is literally the most insulting part of the finale for me. 

What have we stuck around nine years for? Why did we even root for Barney and Robin for so long? Did no one in this group grow up at all? Why would you cheat us out of the happy endings for everyone we deserved? 

How I Met Your Mother, you have hurt me to the core, and I don’t know if I will ever forgive you. 

April 1, 2014 VIEW POST

Rejoice: JK Rowling’s FANTASTIC BEASTS AND WHERE TO FIND THEM will be a trilogy

The New York Times revealed that “three megamovies are planned,” adding “The main character will be a magizoologist’ named Newt Scamander. The stories, neither prequels or sequels, will start in New York about seven decades before the arrival of Mr. Potter and his pals.” ….which is literally the most amazing thing I’ve heard in a while.

MEGAMOVIES, you guys. 

Though it feels a bit Hobbit-esque in that the original book for Fantastic Beasts and Where to Find Them is only a mere 54 pages, I couldn’t be more excited that it was announced the film adaptation will be a trilogy! I love trilogies. And I love magic. The end. 

March 31, 2014 VIEW POST
cuddlesandrage:

Happy 10 YEAR ANNIVERSARY Shaun of the Dead!!
March 29, 2014 VIEW POST
smartgirlsattheparty:

Do you live in Austin, Texas? Wanna go to camp with Smart Girls? 
March 28, 2014 VIEW POST

The TEENAGE MUTANT NINJA TURTLES trailer is here, and it’s….interesting

Um, no thank you? 

The Transformers of turtle movies hits theaters later this year. 

March 27, 2014 VIEW POST

Check out Reel Snarky’s new gig writing for the ENTERTAINMENT WEEKLY Community Blog!

Hi everyone! 

I wanted to share some really exciting news with you all today. I am officially the newest member of a select group of folks who will be contributing to a brand new, community curated blog over at Entertainment Weekly! This is HUGE! 

As an EW Community Contributor, I will be covering a variety of topics, but most notably to start, I’ll be diving into what I like to call flashback Recaps. I’ll start by recapping one of the best lost-but-not-forgotten shows by one of my favorite people: Firefly! That’s right! I know, jealous? 

You can find the EW Community blog here: http://community.ew.com/ 

Check out all of the amazing things going on over there. Into Parenthood? What about Chicago PD? Dance Moms, even? Get your latest recaps and reviews and other fun posts right there. 

I’ll still be writing here everyday of course, but just know if you want all this snark in a cute lil’ EW bow, it’ll be over there gabbing about cool TV shows. 

xoxo,

Reel Snarky

March 26, 2014 VIEW POST

Brand new trailer and poster for X-MEN: DAYS OF FUTURE PAST

Can’t breathe. 

Also, can’t believe this is actually almost here. 

X-Men: Days of Future Past hits theaters May 23. 

March 24, 2014 VIEW POST

The first trailer for FX’s adaptation of FARGO is here!

I’ll be damned if this doesn’t actually look pretty darn good. 

Fargo premieres on FX on April 15. 

March 19, 2014 VIEW POST

SNL announces killer lineup for April hosts and musical guests!

Check that out! I can tell you right now, unless the Saturday Night Live writers royally screw it up, the April 5 show with Anna Kendrick and Pharrell is going to be dope as shit. 

March 29: Louis CK + Sam Smith

April 5: Anna Kendrick + Pharrell

April 12: Seth Rogen + Ed Sheeran

March 19, 2014 VIEW POST