Chris Pratt and Sarah Silverman to host SNL openers
After a lot of speculation, Saturday Night Live finally announced hosts and musical guests for their first two episodes of the upcoming 40th season.
The biggest star in the world, Chris Pratt, is set to host the first episode of the season with musical guest Ariana Grande (SNOOZE). Following those two for the second episode are host Sarah Silverman and musical guest Maroon 5 (SNOOZE).
No word yet on whether or not the rumor that Bill Murray is going to host an episode is true or not. FINGERS FUCKING CROSSED, THOUGH.
Saturday Night Live premieres September 27.
Listen to two previously unreleased Adele songs, weep forever
Fresh on the heels of an announcement After four years with nothing but a cryptic tweet in May, we now have two brand new previously unreleased songs from our beloved Adele.
The two beautiful tracks are said to have been recorded during her 21 sessions, but were chosen to remain unreleased.
Take a listen to “Never Gonna Leave You” (below) and “You’ll Never See Me Again” (link here because the Internet hates me and I can’t find a good embed yet) and remember that we *should* be expecting her new album, 25, sometime later this year.
If you listen closely to “Never Gonna Leave You” you might recognize some lyrics that ended up on “Set Fire to the Rain.”
AMERICAN HORROR STORY: FREAK SHOW teaser roundup
American Horror Story: Freak Show has been churning out several enticing :11 teasers for the past few days, but has still yet to release a full-length trailer for the upcoming season.
Until that happens, feast your eyes on the cryptic and creepy teasers they’ve released so far, and check out the brand new poster to get a look at what your favorite AHS alums’ characters will look like.
2014 Emmys Recap: BREAKING BAD scores big, more MODERN FAMILY, Best & Worst Dressed
Last night’s Emmys were full of surprises, from stunners Benedict Cumberbatch and Martin Freeman winning the statue for Sherlock, to Julia Louis-Dreyfus getting a surprise smooch from Bryan Cranston on the way up to accept her award, to Weird Al’s delightfully strange TV show medley.
I’ve got plenty of opinions on who won and who was egregiously robbed, but until I get to those gripes, feast your eyes on the full winners list below.
FULL WINNERS LIST:
Best Comedy Series - WINNER: Modern Family
"The Big Bang Theory"
"Modern Family" - WE GET IT. YOU’RE FUNNY AND GOOD. NOW SHARE THE WEALTH YOU BIG HILARIOUS BULLIES.
"Orange Is the New Black"
Best Actress in a Comedy Series - WINNER: Julia Louis Dreyfus, “Veep”
Lena Dunham, “Girls”
Edie Falco, “Nurse Jackie”
Julia Louis Dreyfus, “Veep” - I do love this show and yes, JLD does an exceptional job. But this should have gone to Amy Poehler for Parks and Rec and we ALL know it.
Melissa McCarthy, “Mike & Molly”
Amy Poehler, “Parks & Recreation”
Taylor Schilling, “Orange Is the New Black”
Best Actor in a Comedy Series - WINNER: Jim Parsons, “The Big Bang Theory”
Jim Parsons, “The Big Bang Theory” - SNOOOOOOOOZZZEEEEEE
Ricky Gervais, “Derek”
Matt LeBlanc, “Episodes”
Don Cheadle, “House of Lies”
Louis C.K., “Louie”
William H. Macy, “Shameless”
Supporting Actor, Comedy Series - WINNER: Ty Burrell, “Modern Family”
Andre Braugher, “Brookiyn Nine-Nine”
Adam Driver, “Girls” - Surprised me, that’s for sure.
Jesse Tyler Ferguson, “Modern Family”
Ty Burrell, “Modern Family” - Again, we get it. He’s hilarious and crazy talented. But I thought for sure Tony Hale, Comedy Acting God, would get this one.
Fred Armisen, “Portlandia”
Tony Hale, “Veep”
Supporting Actress, Comedy Series - WINNER: Allison Janney, “Mom”
Mayim Bialik, “The Big Bang Theory”
Julie Bowen, “Modern Family”
Allison Janney, “Mom” - Sure.
Kate Mulgrew, “Orange Is the New Black"
Kate McKinnon, “Saturday Night Live”
Anna Chlumsky, “Veep”
Best Drama Series - WINNER: “Breaking Bad”
"Breaking Bad" - Very happy that Breaking Bad’s swan song garnered them so much love this one last time, but still a bit sad that True Detective didn’t nab this.
"Game of Thrones"
"House of Cards"
Best Actress in a Drama Series - WINNER: Julianna Margulies, “The Good Wife”
Lizzy Caplan, “Masters of Sex”
Claire Danes, “Homeland”
Michelle Dockery, “Downton Abbey”
Julianna Margulies, “The Good Wife” - No surprise here, though I would never object to seeing Claire Danes or Kerry Washington win one of these bad boys.
Kerry Washington, “Scandal”
Robin Wright, “House of Cards”
Best Actor in a Drama Series - WINNER: Bryan Cranston, “Breaking Bad”
Bryan Cranston, “Breaking Bad” - Same notes as above. For nostalgia’s sake, this makes me happy. But this was McConaughey’s year, and him not winning for his work on True Detective is a real shame.
Jeff Daniels, “The Newsroom”
Jon Hamm, “Mad Men”
Woody Harrelson, “True Detective”
Matthew McConaughey, “True Detective”
Kevin Spacey, “House of Cards”
Supporting Actor, Drama Series - WINNER: Aaron Paul, “Breaking Bad”
Aaron Paul, “Breaking Bad” - Ditto to above. I could have SWORN Peter Dinklage was the Emmy darling this year. Sigh.
Jim Carter, “Downton Abbey”
Peter Dinklage, “Game of Thrones”
Josh Charles, “The Good Wife”
Mandy Patinkin, “Homeland”
Jon Voight, “Ray Donovan”
Supporting Actress, Drama Series - WINNER: Anna Gunn, “Breaking Bad”
Anna Gunn, “Breaking Bad” - Well deserved. Shut up HATERS, she earned this and you know it.
Maggie Smith, “Downton Abbey”
Lena Headey, “Game of Thrones”
Christine Baranski, “The Good Wife”
Christina Hendricks, “Mad Men”
Joanne Froggatt, “Downton Abbey”
Best Miniseries or Movie - WINNER: "Fargo"
"American Horror Story: Coven"
"Bonnie & Clyde"
"Fargo" - DUH.
"The White Queen"
Best Actress Miniseries or Movie - WINNER: Jessica Lange, “American Horror Story: Coven”
Jessica Lange, “American Horror Story: Coven” - Yup.
Sarah Paulson, “American Horror Story: Coven”
Helena Bonham Carter, “Burton and Taylor”
Minnie Driver, “Return to Zero”
Kristen Wiig, “The Spoils of Babylon”
Cicely Tyson, “The Trip Bountiful”
Best Actor in a Miniseries or Movie - WINNER: Benedict Cumberbatch, “Sherlock: His Last Vow”
Chiwetel Ejiofor, “Dancing on the Edge”
Martin Freeman, “Fargo”
Billy Bob Thornton, “Fargo”
Idris Elba, "Luther"
Mark Ruffalo, “The Normal Heart”
Benedict Cumberbatch, “Sherlock: His Last Vow” - In one of the two biggest surprises of the night, Benedict Cumberbatch bests Fargo juggernauts Martin Freeman and Billy Bob Thornton, as well as Luther rockstar Idris Elba. I love Sherlock and think it deserves all the recognition. But I feel like the Emmys are just making up for lost tim here, and in a year when the acting on Fargo should have taken the top spots, this was a stunner.
Supporting Actor, Miniseries or Movie - WINNER: Martin Freeman, “Sherlock: His Last Vow”
Colin Hanks, “Fargo”
Jim Parsons, “The Normal Heart”
Joe Mantello, “The Normal Heart”
Alfred Molina, “The Normal Heart”
Matt Bomer, “The Normal Heart”
Martin Freeman, “Sherlock: His Last Vow” - Surprise #2. Ditto to what I said above; excellent work from Freeman here, but I was stunned to see him beat out FOUR other nominees from HBO’s AIDS drama The Normal Heart.
Supporting Actress, Miniseries or Movie - WINNER: Kathy Bates, “American Horror Story: Coven”
Frances Conroy, “American Horror Story: Coven”
Kathy Bates, “American Horror Story: Coven” - This was the BIGGEST surprise to me of the night, however. This award in no way should have gone to anyone from AHS: Coven, even if I though their performances were solid enough. This Emmy was Allison Tolman’s to lose, and it is a real fucking shame she didn’t win. Fucking shame.
Angela Bassett, “American Horror Story: Coven”
Allison Tolman, “Fargo”
Ellen Burstyn, “Flowers In the Attic”
Julia Roberts, “The Normal Heart”
Reality-Competition Program - WINNER: "The Amazing Race"
"The Amazing Race"
"So You Think You Can Dance"
"Dancing with the Stars"
Variety Series - WINNER: "The Colbert Report"
"The Colbert Report"
"The Daily Show with Jon Stewart"
"Jimmy Kimmel Live"
"Real Time with Bill Maher"
"Saturday Night Live"
"The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon"
Outstanding Guest Actor in Drama - WINNER: Joe Morton as Rowan Pope in “Scandal”
Paul Giamatti as Harold Levinson in “Downton Abbey”
Dylan Baker as Colin Sweeney in “The Good Wife”
Reg E. Cathey as Freddy in “House Of Cards”
Robert Morse as Bertram Cooper in “Mad Men”
Beau Bridges as Barton Scully in “Masters of Sex”
Joe Morton as Rowan Pope in “Scandal”
Outstanding Guest Actress In A Drama Series - WINNER: Allison Janney as Margaret Scully in “Masters of Sex”
Margo Martindale as Claudia in “The Americans”
Diana Rigg as Lady Olenna Tyrell in “Game of Thrones”
Kate Mara as Zoe Barnes in “House of Cards”
Allison Janney as Margaret Scully in “Masters of Sex”
Jane Fonda as Leona Lansing in “The Newsroom”
Kate Burton as Sally Langston in “Scandal”
Outstanding Guest Actor In A Comedy Series - WINNER: Jimmy Fallon as Host in “SNL”
Bob Newhart as Arthur in “The Big Bang Theory”
Nathan Lane as Pepper Saltzman in “Modern Family”
Steve Buscemi as Marty in “Portlandia”
Jimmy Fallon as Host in “SNL”
Louis C.K. as Host in “SNL”
Gary Cole as Kent Davison in “Veep”
Outstanding Guest Actress In A Comedy Series - WINNER: Uzo Aduba as Suzanne “Crazy Eyes” Warren in “Orange is the New Black”
Natasha Lyonne as Nicky Nichols in “Orange is the New Black”
Uzo Aduba as Suzanne “Crazy Eyes” Warren in “Orange is the New Black” - WEEEE!!!!!!
Laverne Cox as Sophia Burset in “Orange is the New Black”
Tina Fey as Host in “SNL”
Melissa McCarthy as Host in “SNL”
Joan Cusack as Sheila Jackson in “Shameless”
Now on to the good stuff:
Awesome moment: Bryan Cranston and Julia Louis-Dreyfus making out on her way up to accept her Emmy.
Heartbreaking moment: Billy Crystal’s excellent, poignant, beautiful speech about Robin Williams. The video montage was a bit off, but the speech. That speech. It was perfect.
Awesome moment: Amy Poehler doing anything at all.
Funny weird moment: Weird Al’s TV show medley.
And now on to the fashion!
Actor, director Richard Attenborough dies at 90
dinosaur theme park connoisseur actor and director Richard Attenborough has passed away at the age of 90.
If you’re thinking, Damn! He seemed 90 in 1994 when Jurassic Park came out, you’re not alone. But alas, he was only 70, and went on to continue to play the affable yet adorable old white guy in a few other movies.
RIP John Hammond. Hope you’re riding that big T-Rex in the sky.
Taylor Swift announces brand new album, releases first single + video
Taylor Swift announced today that she will be releasing her fifth studio album on October 27, entitled 1989. (Seems reminiscent of Adele’s theme of naming her albums after the age she was when she made them, but I’ll let it slide.)
Swift also released the first single and video off the album, this little gem called “Shake It Off.” It’s about haters hatin’ and people just not understandin’ our dear T. Swift.
Watch the video below and behold the definitive proof that Swift has pretty much dropped all pretenses that she’s still just a country crooner with a pop princess streak and embraced the fact that she’s a bonafide KISS FM queen at this point.
ORANGE IS THE NEW BLACK season 3 adds comedian Mike Birbiglia
Funnyman Mike Birbiglia has been tapped to join the third season of Netflix’s Orange is the New Black.
No word yet on what kind of role he’ll have on the hit show. Seems like the only options are guard, friend or family member in a flashback, or…guard. Right? Either way, neat!
Watch Johnny Depp bumble around adorably in first trailer for MORTDECAI
If you were hankering for a Johnny Depp vehicle that was essentially Pink Panther but with more Johnny Depp mustache and Gwyneth Paltrow for some reason, then today is your lucky day.
Johnny Depp stars in the first trailer for Mortdecai, a tale about a charming but quirky, bumbling and a bit moronic British spy.
All snark aside, this trailer actually looks kind of good, the kind of good that I haven’t seen in a Depp film in a while. He’s really made some stinkers lately, hasn’t he?
Mortdecai hits theaters February 2015 and stars Ewan McGregor, Gwyneth Paltrow, Paul Bettany, Aubrey Plaza, Jeff Goldblum and Olivia Munn.
Breaking news: Actor Robin Williams dies at 63 from apparent suicide
Oscar-winner Robin Williams has died at the age of 63. Reports are still developing, but the initial findings are that his death is contributed to asphyxia (suicide).
I honestly have no words. Celebs die all the time, and it’s always sad, yes. But this one sucks majorly in a way I haven’t experienced in a while. Williams was a big part of some of my favorite childhood movies and was still in his fucking prime. I just can’t believe it’s true.
What a truly sad day.
Watch the first trailer for Disney’s INTO THE WOODS
No singing (which is totes weird), but boy howdy does this look fucking awesome.
Watch the first trailer for Disney’s Into the Woods and get excited to see Anna Kendrick sing something that isn’t “Cups” for once.
And feast your eyes on brand new stills from the film below!
Into the Woods stars Meryl Streep, Anna Kendrick, Chris Pine, Johnny Depp, Emily Blunt, Tracey Ullman, James Corden, Lucy Punch, Christine Baranski, Mackenzie Mauzy and SO MANY MORE.
It hits theaters this Christmas.
Brand new INTERSTELLAR trailer is god damn brilliant
Did you squeal when the first cryptic trailer for Christopher Nolan’s Interstellar hit the webs?
Did you roll your eyes when you heard a brand new, longer and more detailed trailer for the film was shown at Comic-Con but wasn’t available to the nerdy interwebs crowd?
Well, pout no more. The second trailer for Interstellar has finally landed online, and it’s a motherfucking doozie.
Look. Just LOOK. This movie is going to be outstanding.
Interstellar stars Matthew McConaughey, Anne Hathaway, Jessica Chastain, and Michael Caine and hits your eyeballs this November.
Because Christopher Nolan is part of the Illuminati, the video isn’t available to embed, but here’s a direct link.